Who Am I

I’m Brice and this is my blog.

As I write this I am 31 years old, married to my beautiful wife Amanda with two awesome boys (for now). We are certified foster parents and currently we are waiting on our next placement. Jesus is number one in our lives! Pursuit of intimacy with Jesus is our primary focus. Jesus has done some really amazing things in our lives. This is my testimony.

I was not raised in a Christian home but I was raised with basic Christian values. My parents divorced when I was 5 or 6 years old. But they remained amicable, even friends, afterward. My best friend’s parents invited me to come to church with them so they came by and picked me up at my dad’s EVERY Sunday for nearly 10 years! I was baptized, confirmed and communed in the Lutheran Church! A proud German Lutheran! I went on mission trips to Honduras. It was on my third trip to Honduras where I actually got saved. I understood the revelation of Jesus Christ as my Lord and I received Him as my Savior. After graduating High School I toured with a worship team on the East Coast of the USA. I met a great Christian girl in April 2008 at a Christian Youth Event and after a REALLY personally destructive summer she and I started dating that October. Engaged 6 months later and married 10/10/10. (And then again 11/23/10 - she’s Canadian and we had to do it a second time because of immigration)

We bought a house, a dog, a car. Go to church every week. Volunteering diligently, I was in the worship team, then I was a worship leader, then I helped plant churches. All the while hiding my true self from everyone.

Fast forward: For our 9 year anniversary we decided to attend A Power and Love School of Evangelism Hosted by Lifestyle Christianity. We found a babysitter for our boys, drove to Columbus, OH, got a cheap hotel and committed to let Jesus do what He do...change lives.

Worship was amazing, the teaching was so good!

On the third day, during the afternoon session, the speaker was sharing a piece of his testimony and I found myself overwhelmed...emotionally. I started to well with tears and was SO moved! He wasn’t even talking about something that deep. He was sharing about his first job working on a construction site! Then my hands went numb...like when you’ve slept on both arms and they’re asleep. Things started to change really fast. No longer was I simply moved but I started to feel panicked and out of control. Amanda asked a few of the men around me to lay hands and pray. Their touch was painfully electric, like 220V to the shoulders and knees, where they placed their hands. The man behind me was shouting “Come Out! Come out!”.

Despite the stage lights flashing all around me, all I saw was the darkest dark. I found myself overcome and started to shout. And again at the top of my lungs. I felt like I wanted to throw up, but it was as though I was trying to throw up a softball. After shouting however many times all I could see was the deepest darkness. Then, out of nowhere it was pierced with the most brilliant light. Completely obliterating the darkness. It was then I realized I was beholding the glory of God.

I started to become aware of the things around me and I still had no idea what I just experienced. I just knew something was different. I was free! But from what? I didn’t immediately know.

Upon “coming to” I noticed that the whole worship center was lining up for a “fire tunnel” which can only be described as a “full contact rapid prayer tunnel”. When it was my turn, as soon as I entered, one of the leadership team laid his hands on my head for no more than 2 seconds. It was when he placed his hands on my head that I immediately received the understanding of what had just happened moments earlier. The Holy Spirit revealed to me what I had just been delivered from.

I can’t really describe how it felt other than it was the most incredible Joy I had ever experienced. It feels almost immeasurable. To put it in some sort of grid, I was in the delivery room when both of my boys were born. Being able to declare our sons to my wife nearly buckled me with an intense and overwhelming joy. The Joy I had just experienced after the Fire Tunnel makes that seem soo small! Don’t get me wrong! I absolutely love my children. But what should be one of the most incredible moments in one’s life...the birth of a child... pales in comparison to beholding the Glory of God and being set free from a long oppressive addiction. After that moment I couldn’t help but run around and dance and laugh and praise God for who He is and what He has done. I was overcome with worship of the Father.

As the session came to a close I knew that I had to tell my wife what had just happened. We went back to our hotel room and we sat on the bed. I confessed that I had just been radically delivered from a spirit of addiction to lust and pornography. For 22 years this addiction had plagued my life. Six years prior my wife had caught me, I said I would never do it again. In my own power I was able to kick it for awhile but then I just got better at hiding it. She was hurt and shocked and upset but God was doing an amazing thing in her at the same time too. (Which I’ll cover in another post.)

Not only was I delivered from an addiction that dominated me, Jesus saved a marriage that was headed for a LOT of pain if I had not been rescued from my sin.

I’ve never felt more free in my life. And I don’t intend on departing from the reality that I was DEAD in my sin and Jesus called me back to life. I’ve been so alive, more alive than I knew I could ever be.

Fun fact: The man that was standing behind me praying “Come Out! Come Out!”, his name is Lazarus! In John 11, Jesus called a man named Lazarus out of the grave after he had been really dead for days. Jesus used a man named Lazarus to call me out of my grave after I had been dead in my addiction for 22 years!

I no longer live in guilt, shame, regret or condemnation because I have the understand of my relationship with the Father. HE has called me righteous by the Blood of Jesus Christ. I am a son. I am a Son of The King of Kings. And I get to stand before my Father in righteousness. No one can take that away from me.

My desire is to become more and more intimate with Him. He has Ignited a passion and an insatiable hunger for His Word that I have never known before.

He wants you to know Him. To know Him like a father knows his child. To know Him like a husband knows his wife.

His thoughts are for you and your well-being. What If the church allowed themselves to be consumed by those thoughts? What if we consumed ourselves with thoughts of the Father? What if we pursued Him the way He pursues us? What would the church look like? What would our homes, cities, and nations look like?

These are the kinds of questions I like to ask myself. It challenges me to focus on the Word of God and what He is trying to say to me.

Thanks for reading my Testimony. I hope that it will encourage you to pursue a more intimate relationship with the Father.

Brice Eugene